Losing A Friend...

Its sad losing one friend but two? come on how could this be I lost the two that meant a lot to me and were like brothers to me and now I can't say goodbye and I never got to say goodbye to one of them. Here's the story on Jacob's death: Jacob Zachary Campbell, 10/12/10 was the date and at 7:40pm I saw on facebook that someone said "Jacob and Lisa, their dead," and I didn't think it was the Jacob I know, turned on the tv to Fox's news and sure enough it was. Before his death about a year ago when I was in 8th grade going into 9th grade and I was dating a guy named Evan Bing and everyday I would see him and we would walk over to Tom and Jacob's house and we had so many adventures and then middle of 9th grade when Evan broke up with me I stopped talking to everyone that we hung out with and they all started to hate me and turn on me but not Jacob he would still talk to me and sit by me on the bus, we could never hang out because no one liked me anymore but then we started to fade and stopped talking and then I heard about the news and even in school Mr.Quick brought it up and I hated talking about it. Last year when it happened I was in ALC for three hours and the rest of the day at the high school and friends saw me depressed and then two councilors and a cop came to my class in the high school and said "someone said you were going to kill yourself in the bathroom because you are depressed about your friend," and that was the first little giggle they heard because yes I was depressed but not enough to kill myself and so I told them "yes I'm depressed but killing myself? that's a bit too far," and they said okay well we will leave you alone just talk to our intern Kelly and so we talked and that's the end of Jacob's death that I would like to talk about. About Cookie's death: Alexander "Cookie" Cook, 6/18/12 was the day and Kayla Pesek texted me saying Cookie drowned but foolish me I didn't believe it at all and I was at my boyfriend's Jake's house and so I went upstairs and searched it but nothing came up but then I posted on Facebook "somebody better tell me about Cookie!!!!," and people posted on my status about what happened. I remember I ran from the computer in tears ran outside to Jake and held him tightly and I could barely talk and Jake said "was it him? is it true?" and I just shook my head and I wouldn't stop crying for about an hour. The storm that happened that night was Cookie I know it because when it happened that's when they found his body, he went down at 4:57pm and they didn't find him until 11:45pm and in a report I saw it says that he went a third of the way and then once he knew something was wrong he tried turning around to the shore but that's when he slipped under the water and drowned. The next day I talked to Maryrose, Cookie's girlfriend and she is just so depressed and she told me that when she was at the beach and they were looking for him that she said "Cookie if you wanted to break up with me you could have told me," and everyone got a chuckle but she also told me that the storm was him and that he sleeps with her every night she can feel him. Maryrose told me that when they found him, he was 18 feet down and 30 feet from the shoreline, and Maryrose said "he wore his damn pants, he always wears those damn pants no matter what" and she thought it was foolish, she also told me "Cookie said he counted you as one of his best friends, he said you guys had good moments together and had a lot of bro moments together," "also one day I told him that I didn't really like you and he got really mad and said "well you don't have to like her she's my friend not yours," but now I am friends with Maryrose and I try to help her as much as I can. I remember at the health fair we went to the tent where they were talking about being people that did drugs back then and now they are here to help you and "know the truth" about drugs and when I got my bracelet I had a crack in mine and after they packed up I complained to Cookie that mine was cracked and I would never get a new one and he said "oh stop being a drama queen, here have mine" so that's why I were it everyday. We just had a lot of fun and had so many inside jokes and he told me that if Jake (my boyfriend) treats me wrong that he was going to beat his face in because Cookie knows of how many people treated me wrongly and cheated on me and just broke my heart. I don't really know what happened to Cookie but when Jake and I were at his funeral when I first saw his body and I cried badly into Gabby Garcia's arms, something touched my back and I asked if anyone even her touched my back and no one did, I knew it was cook. Before I got to say goodbye to his body the last time I stood by his German jacket on the chair and it was on there pretty good on its hanger and no one was even close to it and all of a sudden his jacket fell, I was shocked so was everyone by his jacket. When Jake's mom picked us up she said I don't really believe in superstitious stuff but they say once someone dies they're spirit is still by the body a couple days and then it fades away so at the funeral Cookie was with us. I didn't have a note or a cookie to throw in the casket but I put my lucky cigarette in there and everyone put theirs in there as well. It was sad because Maryrose wanted to put her rings that she always wears in there but Cookie's guardian said don't honey you keep those because I know you want it to go with him but most of this stuff that's on him will probably get burned because its food and cigarettes and she cried and put her rings back on. I don't really want to talk about it anymore because after that I couldn't sleep, I haven't gotten myself to eat in three days after that, but I will miss them both. When I miss Jacob I play the song "Road To Nowhere" by Bullet For My Valentine and when I miss Cookie I play the song "If I Knew" by Every Avenue